The sports-challenged nerd can dressup as an all-star hockey player; someone who's hopelessly shy can vamp it up as a showgirl; the blue-collar worker can pose as a sugar daddy; or the jock can morph into one of history's great literati for a night.

It was no coincidence that I'd spent the three previous weeks eating ice cream and brooding in my pyjamas after breaking up with my longtime boyfriend.

If we are laughed at or called weird, we may disown our desires and label them as deviant. This has the effect of splintering our sexual identity and placing true and lasting sexual fulfilment up on a shelf out of our reach.

Being in a monogamous relationship can be great, but sleeping with the same person for the long-term can get dull and repetitive - if you and your partner don't make an effort to keep things fresh and exciting.

Perhaps it's clothes made out of sensual and exciting materials - like velvet, silk, rubber or PVC - that exaggerate your partner's body contours and really turn your crank. Being partly dressed rather than totally nude can also be a turn-on.

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